Episode # 10 - The Art Of People By Dave Kerpen

Hello, Self Developers and welcome to the Patrick Kelly Podcast for Self-development where I will be reviewing. Audible books on self-development that can change your life for the better this year and years to come. It is said that if we keep on doing what we always did, we will keep on getting what we always got. In other words, to change our output, we first have to change our input.

Today is March 21, 2021. And this is episode 10. And today we'll be reviewing the Audible  book, the art of people, 11 simple people skills that will get you everything you want by Dave Kerpen. This Audible book explores how to use people's skills in order to understand and connect with family, friends, and associates, and be the best person, others like respect and trust.  

Chapter one. Understanding yourself and understanding people. Self-awareness is a fundamental building block of the art of people. You can't understand and influence others until you fully understand yourself at a deep level. The Enneagram is the best tool to better understand yourself, which in turn can help you make smarter actions. The Enneagram summarizes the nine major Enneagram types. They're associated strengths and potential pitfalls to look out for change the script in your head according to your Enneagram assessment. Once you have better understanding of yourself from the, in Enneagram, you understand your strengths and weaknesses when it comes to communicating with others. The first step in learning to influence others to get what you want your career and in life, is to understand, yourself.  
Chapter two, how to get anyone, if you don't like them. The first step in influencing people is understanding  them. Some people say that they have a hard time getting people, which also means understanding people. If you say you don't get him. You definitely will not get him. It is very difficult to understand people, who are very different from ourselves if you're ever going to want or need to have a meaningful or productive interaction with someone, whether it is a colleague at work, a client of your business, or a cousin at a family gathering, it pays to figure out a way to get that person. Self-determination is a powerful force. And once you refuse to say to yourself, I don't get him, you are better off.   

Chapter three. How to understand someone better than you do your friends in just three minutes. By asking better, smarter questions. We can understand the people we meet much more quickly. And determine rapidly, whether they are friend or foe. Potential business partner or mate, a future employee or casual acquaintance. It is not what you tell someone, it is what you ask them Learn to ask better questions and listen to the answers people were appreciate and better understand you you can break the ice and get to know others by asking better questions.

Chapter four. Be interested instead of interesting. People inherently care a lot more about themselves and their families, than they care about you. The sooner you acknowledge that fact,  the sooner, you get better  at  establishing relationships with people and yielding influence with them. People love to talk about themselves. If you could focus on listening, truly listening attentively to the person you're with. That person will appreciate you, like you, or even adore you, without saying a single thing. As long as that person acknowledges, that you are listening to them. Intently using eye contact and body language and an occasional, tell me more about that, that person will adore you. The secret to getting people to adore you is to shut up and listen.  

Chapter five. Most people are lonely. Help them feel connected. Take the spotlight off of you and put onto someone else. Once a conversation is started. And in these five words, tell me more about yourself. Even after the person. Does all the talking about themselves. They will feel as if they had a great conversation with you. Because you were an excellent listener. Always listen to understand authentically, try to connect deeply with people. Help people feel less lonely and you'll find yourself far more able to influence them. By approaching people with the intent to understand them and more deeply to connect with them we differentiate ourselves from most people in the world.
Chapter six. Wear orange shoes, the simple keys to networking that nobody  talks about. Stand out at conferences by wearing something that is attention grabbing, and it feels authentic to you. So that people will talk to you about it. I E. Orange shoes. People will inquire where you got the shoes from and be willing to start conversations with you. This will create the opportunity to find out more about them. Remember you are seeking first to understand, and then to be understood. We understand people by the questions we ask them. And then become an authentic listener.

Chapter seven. How to meet just about anyone. Here is a blueprint for success on the social media network linked in. Number one, create a full profile, with attention given to every school you attended, organizations you worked at,  and professional groups, you have been  in.  the more you put in your profile, the more you will potentially have in common with people that you want to connect with. Number two connect with all the people that you went to school with and have worked with. Number three. Anytime you meet someone. Look that person up on LinkedIn. Find a mutual connection and right to the mutual connection, using an introduction. Number four.  Once you get connected, set up a meeting with your new connection.

Closing thoughts. On a scale of one to five. I would rate this audible book with a solid five. For breaking down many steps, on how to improve your people skills. In the show notes, I will leave a link on how to get your own in Enneagram assessment. You can take the quiz to assess your own individual people's skills, by going to  www.artofpeoplebook.com

This is the end of this Podcast for today. Tune in next week, Sunday for the next episode and the next audible book of over 300 books that I'll be reviewing on the Patrick Kelly Podcast for Self-Development. If you enjoy this Podcast, take a moment to rate and review on Apple Podcasts. This really helps me out.

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